If it wasn't you, nothing would happen...
Chinese New Year has been almost the same to me. However, this year is different.It's a sense of lost, sense of saddness...
When I see my cousins bringing their boy/girlfriend back for visitation, my heart hurts. I look back and wonder why things can't be the way I want it to be and stuffs. My relatives asked too. They ask why didn't I bring my boyfriend back. I so much wanted to too. But I can't. I simply can't do anything.
So much that I even dream that he would be back to me, telling me he regretted, sending regards to my parents. The nasty me would say, it's okay. I've told my parents you are long dead.
I'm dreaming too much, hoping too much. I know that deep inside me, it will never ever happen at all.
I realised too. It's has nothing to do with me, but everything dependant and God.
posted by Michelle @ 2/12/2005 11:36:00 PM
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